That's the question you're lying awake with, and nobody in the process is built to answer it. Your attorney knows the law. The bank knows its rate sheet. Neither one sits down with your income after the split, your ex's share of the equity, and the loan it would take to hold the house, and works out whether it holds. That's the seat I take.
There are three ways this ends: you keep the house and buy out your ex, your ex keeps it and buys you out, or you sell and split what's left. Each one is a different loan, a different timeline, and a different set of mistakes. We figure out which one is yours before the decree locks it in, because after that it's expensive to change.
What people get wrong, and what's true:
"Colorado splits everything fifty-fifty."
It doesn't. Colorado divides marital property equitably under CRS § 14-10-113, which means fairly by the court's read of the circumstances, not automatically down the middle. The buyout number depends on the split, and the split isn't automatic.
"I'll just refinance later."
If the decree says your ex comes off the mortgage, "later" has a date on it. And your ex's name stays on the loan, and on their credit, until the refinance actually funds.
"I can't qualify on my own."
Maybe. Court-ordered child support and maintenance can count as income when they're documented right. We run it before anyone assumes.
"The buyout is taxable."
Transfers between spouses in a divorce generally aren't, under IRC § 1041. What can change is your tax picture when you sell years later. Your CPA and I cover that on the first call, not after.
Most couples assume the house gets handled after the decree. Sometimes the better move is before it, while you're still married on paper and the tax rules still treat you as one household.
Timing decides more than people expect: what you keep after taxes, whether one of you can qualify for the next place, and how much leverage either side has when the listing goes live.
I made this video for the couples who ask me "should we just sell it now?" It's the short answer; the first call is the long one.
Timing, taxes, and who's on the hook, from someone who's been through it.
Most divorce buyouts get decided in the wrong order. The attorneys negotiate a split, the decree gets entered, and then someone calls a lender and finds out the loan doesn't work: the income after support doesn't carry it, the equity was guessed instead of appraised, or the timeline in the decree can't be met. Now the decree has to be reopened, or the house gets sold under pressure.
When the mortgage side is in the room early, the decree gets written around what's actually fundable. That's the difference, and it's yours.
What that looks like in practice:
A real equity number.
An appraisal both sides can live with, before the split is negotiated, so the buyout is a number and not an argument.
Your loan, tested first.
Your income after the split — including support, when it qualifies — run against the loan it takes to hold the house. If it works, your attorney knows. If it doesn't, you know before you fight for a house you can't keep.
Decree language that funds.
The dates, the payoff terms, and how the equity transfers, written so a lender can actually act on them. I give your attorney the mortgage side of the wording.
One person on the whole move.
If you're the one leaving, I place your next loan and, in the Vail Valley or the Denver Metro, write your offer. If the house sells, I list it. Nobody gets handed off.
The house isn't the fight. The house is the math. Get the math right early and there's a lot less to fight about.
— Bobby Friel · CO Home Equity
If you knew before the decree exactly what it would take to keep the house, how would that change what you ask for?
| Keep and buy out | Keep and refinance | Sell and split | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Who stays | You | You | Neither |
| Your ex's name | Off the title | Off the title and the loan | Off both |
| The loan | A second lien or line for the buyout | One new first mortgage | None; proceeds split |
| Your rate | Keeps the old one | Today's rate | — |
| Income needed | Yours, after support | Yours, after support | Neither |
| Timeline | Weeks after the decree | Weeks after the decree | The market's |
| Fits | Settled split, income carries it, low old rate | Decree requires the refinance, or the old rate is already high | One income can't hold it, or you both want a clean break |
If your old rate is low and the split is settled, the buyout usually keeps it. If the decree says your ex comes off the loan, the refinance is the option whether you like the rate or not. If neither works, selling isn't losing; it's both of you leaving with what you built.
First the split: what the house is worth, what's owed, and each of your shares. Then what it costs a month to keep it once you've paid your ex their share.
The split
Your ex's share (the buyout)
$300,000
What it costs to keep it
Loan term
Monthly payment, fully loaded · 30-yr fixed
$5,149 / mo
This is an estimate on the numbers you entered. The equity share comes from your decree, the value from an appraisal, and the loan from an underwritten file. The real number comes from the conversation.
Want to see whether it works on your income?The house is the biggest asset in the divorce and nobody has run the mortgage side yet.
You want to keep it and don't know if you can, or you're leaving and need to know what you're walking away with.
Your attorney or mediator wants a number they can build the decree around.
You'd rather know now than find out after the decree is entered.
You need legal advice. That's your attorney, and I work beside them, not instead of them.
The house is already sold or the decree is final and funded. Then it's a normal purchase or refinance, and those pages are the right ones.
You want someone to say you should keep the house. What you'll get is what it takes; the decision is yours, and we get there together.
Illustrative, not specific clients
A Highlands Ranch mom with two kids in the neighborhood school wanted to stay. The old mortgage rate was one nobody sees anymore. We appraised early, her attorney negotiated a split around a real number, and a second lien paid her ex's share the week the decree was entered. First mortgage untouched. Kids never changed schools.
A Fort Collins couple's decree said his name came off the loan within months. Her income alone was thin until the maintenance was documented the way a lender needs it. We built the file around it, refinanced into her name, and paid him his share at signing. Done inside the decree's window.
A Colorado Springs couple where neither income could carry the house. I listed it, priced it to move in the season they were in, and both sides left signing day with their share. I placed her purchase loan the next month. He rented for a year and called when he was ready.
Confidential from the first minute. Here's the order, whichever path you take.
What's going on, where the divorce stands, and what you want the house to do for you. You leave with an action plan and the list of what to gather: the mortgage statement, your income after the split, the decree draft if there is one.
Through my secure client portal, or by phone. Income, support documentation, credit, and the house.
A value both sides can live with, and I give your attorney the mortgage side of the numbers and the decree language a lender can act on.
What the first call, your file, and the appraisal told us, on paper: buyout, refinance, or sale, with the payment or the proceeds beside each. We pick together, and your attorney gets the same page.
Your attorney does this part. I stay on call for the mortgage questions that come up while it's negotiated.
Buyout or refinance funds once the decree is entered; the ex gets their share, the title transfers. Or the house goes on the market and I run the sale.
Papers, keys, or the check. And if you're the one moving, the next loan is already placed.
Colorado's waiting period after filing is time you can use. Most of the work above happens inside it, so the money moves the week the decree does.
If you're the one leaving, you're not starting over; you're starting with a settlement, a new income picture, and a decree that a lender will read line by line.
The things that decide whether you qualify are the things nobody explains: how support counts, when the old mortgage stops counting against you, and how soon after the decree you can write an offer.
This video walks through it. Bring it, and the decree, to the first call, and we'll turn it into a plan.
What lenders look at, how support income counts, and how soon you can move.
Each path goes straight to the page that answers your question.
I've been through my own divorce. What I remember isn't the paperwork; it's not knowing who to ask. My attorney was great on the law and couldn't run a mortgage. The bank treated me like any other application. Nobody was looking at the whole picture, and the house was the whole picture.
That's the seat I built this practice to fill. I'm the mortgage broker and the real estate broker on your file, working beside your attorney, and I've sat on your side of the table. I won't push you to keep the house. You'll know exactly what it takes, and we'll get there together.
If you're an attorney or mediator reading this on a client's behalf: send them here. I'll give you a number you can build a decree around, and I'll keep it confidential.
One confidential conversation about where the divorce stands and what you want the house to do for you. You leave with an action plan and the list of what to gather. Your attorney is welcome on the call.
This page is general information about Colorado divorce and your home, not legal or tax advice. Your attorney and CPA advise you; I place the loan or run the sale. Every figure on this page is an estimate until your file is underwritten.
Divorce buyouts, refinances, and home sales in Colorado handled by Bobby Friel, licensed mortgage broker and licensed real estate broker, based in Edwards and serving families across Colorado. Insurance through our insurance partner. 42 five-star Google reviews. (720) 799-2202 · info@cohomeequity.com.
Bobby Friel · NMLS# 332039 · Friel-Good Mortgage, Inc. · NMLS# 1901977 · Edwards, Colorado